


Love Poems for Us

by OhHelloFandoms123



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Angst, Loss of loved one, Love Poems, M/M, Suicide
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-19
Updated: 2020-05-19
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:00:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,083
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24263242
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/OhHelloFandoms123/pseuds/OhHelloFandoms123
Summary: Sam finds a notebook of Bucky's letters and poems.
Relationships: Sam Wilson/Bucky Barnes
Comments: 6
Kudos: 21





	Love Poems for Us

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Siancore](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Siancore/gifts), [honestlyfrance](https://archiveofourown.org/users/honestlyfrance/gifts).



**Love Poems for Us**

_Sam, I’m sorry I didn’t tell you earlier. I hoped that maybe one day I could have told you. I was afraid and I’m sorry. Tell our story. Read my poems. Read my notes. Please, Sam. I love you._

Sam started to cry, a lot. His hands were shaking. He couldn’t feel anything anymore. It was like love didn’t exist. With trembling hands, he flipped through the notebook, he was always so fascinated by Bucky’s handwriting. He flipped open the first page of the journal.

_To: My Samuel_

_From: Your Bucky_

_I hope when you’re reading this we have a house in the woods and three hundred baby goats and three cats._

The lump in Sam’s throat only grew. “I’m not ready,” he tells himself, looking back at his husband’s notes and letters – there was an ache in his chest he couldn’t quite explain. He smiled at the ‘three hundred goats’ part. They only have two goats and two cats. 

_ Day One _

__ _Can you hear me?_

_I stand with you_

_In all circumstances, no matter what;_

_I’ll be with you._

_I promise._

He wasn’t sure if he could keep going. He didn’t know Bucky could write like this, on their wedding day Bucky’s opening lines to his vows were: ‘Hope everyone hasn’t drunk too much because then you won’t remember my awesome-ass speech.’ It was funny and so true to Bucky’s character.

_ Day Two _

__ _Nothing in the world can compare to your beauty_

_Nature whispers against your lips._

_Fair skin, softer than flowers_

_Eyes more stellar than the sky_

_For life equals the features of your light._

_ Day Three _

__ _I’ve never seen such fierce in brown before_

_A yearn for life in those brown eyes_

_Soft skin, the silk of chocolate_

_Name of a hero, passionate and strong_

_I want to hold your hand_

_For our fantasy_

_I love kissing you, infatuation of our souls_

_This bubbling feeling I can’t escape;_

_You hold a place in my heart_

_How you outshine the stars and the sun itself_

_A single smile would make my day_

_Simply, all to say,_

_My dearest Sam,_

_You mean a lot. My soul burns everyday to hold you._

_For my Sammy,_

_From Your Jamie_

His body felt weak, he could feel the love Bucky was sending. He missed him so much. He just wanted to hold him again. Maybe forever. Intoxicating the smell and touch of Bucky Barnes would be a heavenly send-off. He missed everything about his man, his lover, his _soulmate._ He took in a deep breath, maybe he shouldn’t do this but James - his precious James… this was the last of him and he was going to take it all in. 

_ Day Four _

__ _You’re so beautiful under the moonlight._

_ Day Five _

__ _I look at our linked hands under the sheets_

_Our bodies connected_

_Oh, please_

_It was heaven_

_right there, in your arms._

_I would enjoy every second of it_

_I would take that moment and carry it with me_

_Your touch is golden._

Sam knew Day Five was about their first time. How it was so sweet and gentle, making sure the other was okay. God, it was beautiful. A painting to be hung up for all to see, to show their love and permanent affection.

_Day Six_

__ _Your eyes burn with desire_

_They speak to us:_

_Let’s care our names into the tree, let’s sink into our love story_

_ Day Seven _

__ _Inject your infection into my bones till they’re weak_

_Stain my skin and soul with your love_

_Make me yours._

_Please_

_ Day Eight _

__ _Here._

_Here in our heart, home, hands._

_It would be beautiful way to live and it will be_

_ Day Nine _

__ _Samuel,_

_Have I ever told you that you have the best features?_

_How do they shine like the stars and bring euphoria to my skin?_

_To every aching pore, every kiss and touch sends me higher to the clouds with you._

_You’re so heavenly Sam Wilson._

_You made me believe angels existed._

_ Day Ten _

__ _I hope that your smile never dies when I do._

The words rung in his head. Jamie just wanted him to smile, so he did smile. He started crying because he was always so soft and gentle, a true treasure and memory to him. 

_ Day Eleven _

__ _With you? I’ve never felt stronger._

_I felt like I could hold up the world for you._

_I love you._

_ Day Twelve _

__ _I hope I can get this message across as efficiently as I’d like to._

There was an image of their wedding rings and them holding hands. Underneath was a smiley face and a little note.

_Basically, I love you._

_ Day Thirteen _

__ _Hold me forever._

There were so many pages left, so many scribbles and photos and drawings. At the back of the book it said:

It’s going to be okay. I’m always going to be here. Understand, Sam?

Sam nodded and took a deep breath, “I understand Bucky,” he smiled weakly, sitting down on the bed and feeling the cold bed sheets. 

_Day Fourteen_

__ _You taste so sweet_

_You’re an addiction and I never want to stop doing you._

Sam was astounded by the beautiful words. There were so many poems and lines and pictures – it was something he’d keep forever. He stopped flipping when he saw a particular page that had ink splatters and stains on it.

~~ _MY NOTE:_ ~~

~~ _Dear Sam,_ ~~

~~ _I_ ~~

The note wasn’t finished, it was crossed out and underneath was another poem.

_ Day Twenty-Two _

__ _When I die, lay me down carefully in my angel’s arms_

_Engrave something audibly stupid into my headstone_

_I want my Sammy to smile when he thinks of me._

_*Make it like: ‘I didn’t know borax could be added to salt’, just something so stupidly adorable that my man shows that dumb-ass adorable tooth gap again._

Sam chuckled, even when he was gone, Bucky always made him smile. He skimmed through some pictures and kept reading a few random pages.

_ Day Thirty _

__ _I will forever be grateful for our love._

_It’s engraved into my head._

_I still haven’t gotten you that steering wheel, huh?_

In fact, he hasn’t. Sam smiled again, Bucky didn’t need to get him a steering wheel, he already got everything he needed. There were a few things about Steve or his time in Wakanda, God he loved Bucky Barnes to death. He was glad he met him. He was glad Bucky was there when he needed him.

He just really loves him.


End file.
